Caring for Aging Parents Checklist

Do you take care of your aging parents or are you planning to visit your aging parents over the holidays? 

That’s great! Below you will find a checklist for caring for aging parents.

Be sure to look for warning signs of physical or mental health decline while caring for aging parents.

Sure, you must have been checking up on them every week through phone calls that always end with them assuring you that they’re doing great. But unfortunately, many aging parents won’t admit to their children that things have changed since they last visited and that lately, they’ve been facing difficulties performing basic, day-to-day activities.

They may be afraid to lose their sense of independence or perhaps they simply don’t want to add to their children’s worries. In such cases, a holiday visit is a great opportunity to observe your loved ones in-person for any warning signs.

It is important that when caring for aging parents, you keenly observe their living condition as well as their physical and mental health to make sure they aren’t giving you false assurance. They may look fine and it may seem that they’re managing everything quite well but you should look for any signs and clues to ensure that you’re better prepared for the future.

Here’s the ultimate ‘caring for aging parents’ checklist featuring the top 14 signs you should look for when visiting your aging parents over the holidays.

1.  Look for Bounced Checks, Late Payment Notices, and Collection Calls

Bounced checks, late payment notices, and collection calls – these may be a sign that your aging parents are experiencing financial woes and they don’t want you to know about it. It may also indicate they’re suffering from memory loss or early dementia.

Be wary, as this might just be a small sign of the whole disorganization they have been struggling with lately.

2.  Ill-maintained Household and Broken Appliances

Look around the house for any broken appliances, damaged furniture, or piles of clutter.

Do you see they haven’t been running maintenance checks or have failed to recognize the need for doing so?

It may be a sign of a physical or neurological problem. They probably have lost the energy to maintain the household and remove clutter or perhaps their deteriorating memory doesn’t allow them to clean the mess they create.

3.  Unusual Mood Changes or Mood Swings

Make sure you spend sufficient time with your elderly parents on your visit to identify any signs of mood swings. Listen to them carefully and pay attention to their tone and emotions as they talk to you.

If within an hour, their mood shifts from being delighted to being irritated and then to being sad, it may be a red flag.

4.  Dirty, Disorganized Living Area

The house that looked so clean and well-organized on your last visit is now a total mess. What does it mean?

Your aging loved ones may be facing problems with cleaning the house due to mobility issues. It is also possible that some spots are left dirty simply because they can’t see the dirt there. If you see many things scattered on the floor, it may be because they can’t bend as easily as they used to before.

Not to mention that these things increase their risk of tripping and injuring themselves as they walk around the house.

senior assistance for daily care

5.  Confusion and Difficulty Performing Habitual Tasks

Do you notice your aging parents facing difficulty or acting uncertain when performing familiar tasks?

It may be a sign of a major decline in their physical or mental health. While mobility issues may come in the way of daily activities, it’s also possible that they have entirely forgotten how to do something that they have always done on their own.

6.  Changes in Eating Habits

When visiting aging loved ones over the holidays, make sure you check their kitchen and refrigerator for the quantity and quality of food stored. Do you see fresh fruits and vegetables in there? Does it seem that they’ve been eating proper, healthy meals?

Don’t hesitate to discuss their eating habits. Try to find out if they’ve been consuming boxed meals a little too often lately. Also, note if they’ve lost or gained a considerable amount of weight since your last visit.

Sudden, unexplained weight loss may indicate that they’ve been skipping meals or failing to meet their daily dietary requirements while a spike in their weight may be a sign of unhealthy eating or dementia. Oftentimes, elderly people repeat their meals over and over, forgetting that they’ve already eaten.

7.  Forgetting to Take Medicines

Don’t forget to see if your aging parents have been taking proper doses of their medications. Not taking medications or taking more than the prescribed dosage are both major red flags.

If they don’t take their medicines on time, it will likely decline their health. Similarly, if they’re overdosing, it may result in some serious side effects.

It’s a great idea to set up weekly medication boxes for them to keep track of their daily dosages.

senior care as we age

8.  Impaired Driving

One of the best ways to assess the mental health of your aging loved ones is by asking them to take you out for a drive. See if the request makes them uncomfortable or nervous.

Before the ride begins, check if there are any dents or scratches on the car that wasn’t there when you last visited. See if they remember to fasten their seatbelt before starting the car.

While they’re driving, note if they easily get distracted or confused. Try to talk to them and see if they can multi-task.

9.  Reluctant about Leaving the House

When you visit your aging parents over the holidays, suggest going out for a walk or a casual visit to a public place – and see how they react.

If they’re disinterested or reluctant to leave the house instead of being excited like the last time, it may be a sign of social withdrawal or bad physical health.

10.  A Noticeable Decline in Mobility

You should pay close attention to how your aging parents walk and move around the house. If they’re keen on sitting or lying on the bed the entire time or are walking with an unusual gait, it may be a sign of joint or muscle pain or neurological problems.

If you notice they’re facing problems in maintaining their balance, they may be at risk of falling and injuring themselves.

You would want to consult with their doctor to consider options to ensure their safety, including mobility aids, physical therapy, and pain management exercises.

elderly parent outside

11.  Inability to Make Sound Decisions

With a decline in mental health, your elderly loved ones may start to face difficulty in making decisions. They may lose their ability to evaluate a situation, identify the potential solutions, and weigh different options to reach a solid conclusion.

If you note any signs of cognitive decline, you should consider talking to a physician for their memory problems.

12.  Low Overall Score on Cleanliness

When you meet your aging parents over the holidays, look for any changes in their personal grooming habits.

Are they wearing fresh clothes? Are their nails and hair clean as usual?

Look for any strange body odor that may indicate that they haven’t been taking care of themselves the way they used to. It is also possible that the thought of getting in the shower scares them of slipping and falling.

In addition to this, take a good look around the house to see if it meets the usual standards in terms of cleanliness and organization. Any changes in personal or residential cleanliness may be due to physical ailments or memory issues.

13.  Unexplained Injuries or Bruises

Do you get the usual ‘I can walk and move just fine’ response every time you inquire about your aging loved ones’ mobility?

Unexplained injuries and bruises may tell you otherwise!

Look for any bumps, scratches, or bruises on their body that indicate that they’ve been injuring themselves due to balance and mobility issues.

14.  Feelings of Loneliness or Depression

If your aging parents are not willing to get out of bed despite you insisting them, they may have built the habit of staying in alone. When you ask people in their circle about their routine, you may get to know that your aging parents no longer interact with anyone.

See if they’re no longer interested in activities that they used to enjoy in the past. They may not eat properly and spend most of the time of their day sulking, resulting in a noticeable weight loss.

All these signs may indicate that they’re depressed and lonely and need professional help.

What You Should Do Next

It’s crucial to understand that most of these changes are part and parcel of aging. However, what’s more, important is that you recognize the warning signs as per the ‘caring for aging parents’ checklist, take necessary steps to provide your loved ones with extra care, and devise a care plan.

And don’t forget to consider the legal aspect of this situation as well! Ideally, you should obtain important documents regarding your aging parents’ medical, financial, and estate information. Apart from this, you must have access to their social security number, insurance policies, driving license, and deed to their home.

Now, this may sound overwhelming and seem like a lot of complicated work, but with the help of an experienced elder law attorney, this can be a much smoother process. Consulting an elder law attorney can provide options enabling only enable your aging loved ones to live independently at their home with maximum safety and also give you the much-needed peace of mind while you’re away from them.

Paths  Elder Law, an elder law attorney in the Kansas City, Missouri area that is here to help with the next step. Visit our website www.elderlawmo.com for great resources on the elder law process.

 

 

 

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Community Relations

Jeane M. Fracassa

Community Relations

Jeane M. Fracassa

Jeane Fracassa – a dedicated and accomplished professional who retired with an impressive 38-year service record from the Kansas City Missouri Police Department. Throughout her illustrious career, Jeane served as a Civian Supervisor in the Communications Unit, where she played a pivotal role in ensuring efficient and effective communication within the department.

Even in retirement, Jeane’s commitment to community service remains unwavering. Currently, she serves in various capacities within Community Relations at Paths Law Firm. Actively engaged in the Lee’s Summit and Overland Park communities, she proudly represents the law firm.

In all aspects of her life, Jeane Fracassa exemplifies the values of community, compassion, and family. Her commitment to making a difference and her love for exploration make her a remarkable individual, whose presence brightens the lives of those she encounters. Whether at work, with family, or during her travels, Jeane’s genuine care for others and her zest for life make her a truly remarkable and inspiring person.

Administrative Assistant

Laura E. Messer

Administrative Assistant

Laura E. Messer

Laura is the Law Firm’s marketing assistant, supporting all marketing tasks, including managing calendars, researching upcoming events, updating marketing software and spreadsheets, and partnering with organizations to maintain relationships that benefit Paths Law Firm’s clients.  Laura is also the law firm’s professional photographer as she provides the professional photographs for the headshots, organizations, events, and networking.

Laura has over 10 years of experience as a professional photographer.  She is also Adobe and Microsoft Certified.  She graduated from Columbia College, Columbia, Missouri with her Bachelor of Arts degree, Magna Cum Laude, in Behavioral Psychology (minors in Social Work and Criminal Justice), and her Photographic Craftsman degree from Professional Photographers of America. She is certified as a Qualified Mental Health Professional, Certified Gentle Teacher, Medicaid Billing Certified, Crisis Intervention Counselor, and a Missouri Notary.

Laura has been married more than 26 years and has a daughter and a son. She has four brothers, a niece, and a nephew. Her four spoiled pets that love her attention. A lot of Laura’s off time is spent taking photos and she is an internationally published photographer. Laura owns a studio on the historic Independence Square. 

Administrative Assistant

Holly D. Bramble

Administrative Assistant

Holly D. Bramble

Holly is our newest member of the administrative team. She is hardworking, has proven organizational skills and excellent communication skills. Holly has transitioned to the Estate Planning field from healthcare administration where she gained valuable knowledge that has contributed to her success here at Paths.

Holly enjoys spending time with loved ones, cheering for the Chiefs, and relaxing on the beach.

Administrative Assistant

Tressa L. Purdy

Administrative Assistant

Tressa L. Purdy

Tressa has the important role of being a client’s initial point of contact as the law firm’s receptionist for all locations.  She also welcomes, assists, and cares for clients at the Lee’s Summit office. Additionally, she provides support in an administrative capacity for the attorneys, staff, and clients.  When you meet Tressa, the first quality many note is her readiness to be of assistance.

 

Tressa is a graduate of Park Hill High School with extensive administrative experience and executive level management. Tressa brings a stability and comfort to the law firm experience having worked in a variety of industries and having lived in six different major metropolitan cities.

 

Tressa has a daughter, two sons, and one grandchild.  In her free time, she enjoys her family and friends, loves being outdoors, gardening, bike riding and bird watching. Indoor hobbies include scrapbooking, painting cookies, and cheering on Chiefs football. She is a Kansas City native but enjoys traveling but is always happy to be back in her hometown.  

Attorney

Kathleen E. Overton

Attorney

Kathleen E. Overton

Kathleen Overton is an attorney and owner at Paths Law Firm. She has more than 17 years of experience advocating for those with special needs and navigating the state and federal agencies formed to help the disabled and elderly. At Paths Law Firm, Kathleen’s practice focuses on helping the elderly qualify for nursing home Medicaid, creating estate plans to protect beneficiaries, as well as a lot of time planning and forming businesses. Kathleen also enjoys helping clients form non-profit organizations and obtain 501(c)(3) tax exempt status.

 

After attending law school at the University of Oklahoma, Kathleen began representing clients before the Social Security Administration. Eventually her practice switched to federal court appeals and Kathleen spent years representing clients before the Eastern and Western District of Missouri, the District of Kansas, and the Eighth Circuit Court of Appeals. Kathleen has since focused her practice on estate planning and elder law after watching clients struggle to find ways to financially care for loved ones with special needs or aging parents.

 

Kathleen lives in the Northland with her husband and four children. She spends her free time attending soccer matches and ballet performances with her children and starting endless home improvement projects with her husband. 

Medicaid paralegal

Tena K. Dooley

Medicaid Paralegal

Tena K. Dooley

Tena is a Medicaid Paralegal.  She is very meticulous and organized.  She works closely with the attorneys, clients, and State representatives. 

Tena has an associate in applied science and has over 20 years of office management experience. She has two daughters and one grandson.

Tena enjoys spending time with her family.  She enjoys everything outdoors and her hobbies include fishing and gardening.

PARALEGAL & ACCOUNTANT

Sydney R. Morris

PARALEGAL & ACCOUNTANT

Sydney R. Morris

Sydney is the law firm’s internal accountant and one of their experienced paralegals having been with Paths Law Firm since 2017. She is a primary point of contact for estate planning and business planning.

Sydney graduated with honors from the University of Missouri Kansas City in 2022 with her Bachelor of Science Degree in Accounting. She is a Bloch Launchpad, Phi Theta Kappa, and National Honor Society alumni.

In her free time, Sydney enjoys spending time with her husband, reading, baking and going on long walks. 

SENIOR ADMINISTRATIVE ASSISTANT

Christy L. Phillips

SENIOR ADMINISTRATIVE ASSISTANT

Christy L. Phillips

Christy has three years of experience in elder law working for seniors and their families. She is currently the Senior Administrative Assistant and organizes the day to day functions of the office and makes sure everything runs smoothly. When asked why she loved what she does, Christy said at Paths Law Firm, she gets the opportunity to help clients in more ways than one. Her favorite parts of the job are getting to know the clients and helping them get their questions answered. 

Christy’s experience in the finance industry has been extremely beneficial to her role as the Senior Administrative Assistant. Christy has a special place in her heart for the elderly and attributes this to the relationship she had with her grandparents. 

Christy was raised in Ogden, Utah and moved to Independence, MO, when she was ten years old. She has been with her high school sweetheart for 25 years and they have two beautiful children together. Her daughter works in the medical industry, and her son currently attends High School and plays Baseball. When Christy is not working, she enjoys crafting and spending time with her family and friends.

Christy’s experience in the finance industry has been extremely beneficial to her role as Benefits Coordinator. There have been many influences that went into her decision to select the field of Elder Law. Christy has a special place in her heart for the elderly and attributes this to her relationship with her grandparents.

When asked why she loves what she does, Christy said that at Paths Elder law, she gets the opportunity to help clients in more ways than one. Her favorite part of her job is getting clients approved for Medicaid or VA benefits as it is a huge relief for them and their loved ones.

Christy was raised in Ogden, Utah, and moved to Independence, MO, when she was ten years old. She has two children that keep her busy and fill her life with joy! Christy’s daughter cheers for Avila University, and her son plays competitive baseball for the Bucks and races BMX locally for the Motorcycle Closeout Team.

When Christy is not working, she enjoys crafting and making homemade gifts for her loved ones and raising her kids to be healthy, happy, and positive humans.

 

Practice Areas

  • Medicaid Benefits
  • VA Benefits

 

Professionalc Memberships and Affiliations

  • Missouri Notary

FINANCIAL MANAGER

René A. Fracassa

Rene A. Fracassa, Paths Law

FINANCIAL MANAGER

René A. Fracassa

René is the Financial Manager at Paths Law Firm overseeing all aspects of revenue, expenses, and financial planning. She is also responsible for general office management, including assisting in many of the administrative matters that periodically arise. 

 

René earned her Bachelor of Science in Hotel and Restaurant Management from Central Missouri State University in Warrensburg, Missouri and soon thereafter worked her way through management at The American Restaurant where she worked almost 17 years before relocating to the country of China.

 

René is the Financial Manager at Paths Law Firm overseeing all aspects of revenue, expenses, and financial planning. She is also responsible for general office management, including assisting in many of the administrative matters that periodically arise. 

 

René earned her Bachelor of Science in Hotel and Restaurant Management from Central Missouri State University in Warrensburg, Missouri and soon thereafter worked her way through management at The American Restaurant where she worked almost 17 years before relocating to the country of China.

 

René is the Financial Manager at Paths Law Firm overseeing all aspects of revenue, expenses, and financial planning. She is also responsible for general office management, including assisting in many of the administrative matters that periodically arise. 

 

René earned her Bachelor of Science in Hotel and Restaurant Management from Central Missouri State University in Warrensburg, Missouri and soon thereafter worked her way through management at The American Restaurant where she worked almost 17 years before relocating to the country of China.

 

René is the Financial Manager at Paths Law Firm overseeing all aspects of revenue, expenses, and financial planning. She is also responsible for general office management, including assisting in many of the administrative matters that periodically arise. 

 

René earned her Bachelor of Science in Hotel and Restaurant Management from Central Missouri State University in Warrensburg, Missouri and soon thereafter worked her way through management at The American Restaurant where she worked almost 17 years before relocating to the country of China.

 

In her spare time, René is currently quite active managing multiple generations of her family, including parents and grandkids.  René has had great impact on the lives of many women teaching discipling and teaching and abundance of Bible Studies. Her former career in management and event planning trained her well to juggle all the activity.

MARKETING MANAGER

Hilary R. Tichota

MARKETING MANAGER

Hilary R. Tichota

Hilary plays a vital role in managing the Marketing Department at Paths Law Firm.  She is excellent at bringing new ideas and sharing valuable resources with the law firm and our community. Hilary has been with the law firm since the beginning, working in nearly every role which is invaluable in her marketing endeavors as she brings a unique set of skills into the Marketing Department.

Hilary is nearly complete in her Bachelor’s of Arts Degree in Marketing at Park University.  She has earned the honor of being listed in National Honors Society, Phi Theta Kappa, and the Dean’s List. Hilary is always looking for new and innovative ways to share the law firm’s message.

While not working, Hilary spends her time with her family at their rural home. They tend to their chickens and honeybees and enjoy the solitude of country living.

SR. PARALEGAL & OPERATIONS MANAGER

Jennifer A. Bronson

SR. PARALEGAL & OPERATIONS MANAGER

Jennifer

Jennifer is the Sr. Paralegal and Operations Manager at Paths Law Firm.  She oversees the firm’s probate department as well developing, implementing, and managing all the firm’s administrative processes having been with the law firm almost from the beginning.  She enjoys client contact as well as behind-the-scenes operations.

 

Jennifer began her legal career in 1990 as a legal secretary.  She has worked in small and medium sized firms, as well as court operations.  She has her Paralegal Certificate from Boston University, Law Office Management Certificate from University of Central Missouri, and she is a Master Financial Coach. 

 

Jennifer has two daughters, twin sons, and twin grandsons.  She spends as much time as she can with them.  She enjoys reading, listening to podcasts, and tending her yard. 

ATTORNEY

Russell A. Fracassa (Rusty)

ATTORNEY

Russell A. Fracassa (Rusty)

When asked what he wants to do, his reply was “I just want to sit at the kitchen table and work directly with people.” Rusty enjoys working with clients providing experienced advocacy and supporting them through their unfamiliar and overwhelming situations. Due to all the challenges faced by seniors, it is essential to work with an experienced elder law attorney who has expertise in the law, issues, and concerns affecting seniors and their families.

Rusty brings more than 30 years legal experience and expertise working for seniors and their families as an elder law attorney in Kansas City and surrounding. Prior to law school, Rusty was an accountant and his first couple years practicing law was as a tax attorney. This provides invaluable experience in his current practice of law. Rusty’s focus is helping protect seniors’ assets from taxes and long-term care costs, benefit qualification, and navigating more complex family scenarios in their estate planning.

Rusty has personally experienced the loss every parent fears, caring for a spouse suffering with cancer and the treatment, and working with aging parents through all stages of their lives.  He intimately understands the challenges faced by individuals and their caretakers when capacity or health declines, how to prepare for it, and the legal matters while in the midst of it.  He may not be able to eliminate his client’s grief, but he strives to provide clients with peace of mind.

In 2010, Rusty’s faith and love led him and part of his family to China as Christian missionaries. He and his wife, went permanently, but ended up dedicating 3 years to that ministry. They returned to Missouri to help with grandchildren after a family tragedy and later began anew with Paths Elder Law. The goal is providing compassionate care through legal advocacy.

Rusty has multiple degrees and advanced study spanning his Bachelor’s of Arts in Business Administration – Accounting at Rockhurst College (now Rockhurst University), Masters of Arts in Accounting and in Intercultural Studies, as well as his Juris Doctorate from the University of Missouri at Kansas City School of Law.

When Rusty is not practicing law, he enjoys spending time with his family, grandchildren, and excessive eating at local restaurants.

Practice Areas

  • Wills and Trusts
  • Estate Planning
  • Asset Protection
  • Medicaid Benefits
  • VA Benefits
  • Probate
  • Guardianship and Conservatorships
  • Education

 

BSBA and Master’s in Accounting, Master’s in Inter-Cultural Studies, and Doctorate in Juris Prudence

  • Rockhurst University
  • Liberty University
  • University of Missouri – Kansas City


Admissions to Practice

  • Missouri


Professional Memberships and Affiliations

  • State Bar of Missouri
  • National Academy of Elder Law Attorneys (long-time Member)
  • Elder Counsel (Charter and Ongoing Member)
  • Missouri Association of Trial Attorneys (Past Member)
  • Kansas City Metropolitan Bar Association
  • Missouri State Bar Committees – Elder Law, Estate Planning, Probate